How do you feel when you think about food?
For the average person, the idea of a big plate of food may sound comforting, something to look forward to. But for someone with an eating disorder or a food-related phobia like phagophobia or pseudodysphagia, the thought of food fills them with fear and dread.
I was one of those people. Suddenly, it felt like food was everywhere, the only thing on people’s minds. It seemed impossible to escape. I often wished food wasn’t necessary, just so I wouldn’t have to think about it. But avoiding food wasn’t an option because, in the end, I needed it to survive.
What does someone do when they suddenly find themselves consumed by an irrational, yet very real fear of swallowing or choking? They often feel lost, hopeless, and stuck, hyper-focused on food, eating, drinking, swallowing, and the fear of choking. This creates a debilitating cycle with no clear way out.
If you’ve experienced this condition, you’ve probably asked yourself more than once, “Why me?” In hindsight, I realise that question didn’t really matter. I should have focused on why it came about.
When fear and irrational thoughts take over, it becomes difficult to see the bigger picture.
This condition thrives on the belief that we will choke, yet we rarely stop to question it. Who says this will happen? Why do I believe it? Where did this fear come from? We seldom reflect on how these thoughts took hold in the first place.
We develop an overwhelming certainty, maybe even a feeling, that we are destined to choke with every bite or sip. But what is driving this irrational fear?
If you’re like me, there was likely a time when eating and drinking felt completely normal. Then, at some point, something changed, often gradually. Maybe it began with throat tension, a strange sensation, a panic attack, or even a choking incident.
What is undeniably true is that this condition stems from something traumatic
Whether it was a period of extreme stress and anxiety that built to a breaking point, or a deeply impactful event that your mind struggled to process. The result is the same: a debilitating fixation and, to be frank, an obsession.
Like any other phobia, anxiety disorder, or form of OCD, rational thinking is key. I liken this condition to my OCD because, at its core, it’s fuelled by intrusive thoughts. These thoughts tell you: “Swallowing won’t happen,” “You will choke,” or “There’s something mechanically wrong.” Pay attention to these thoughts and challenge them: Why? What evidence do you have? Like any form of OCD, you’re trapped in a loop of “What ifs.”
Of course, recovery takes time and multiple steps. We need to incorporate relaxation techniques, eliminate stress, address past trauma, and most importantly practice exposure. Exposure is the only way to overcome fear. With exposure comes evidence. Each time we face our fears; we gather proof that nothing bad happened.
There’s no way to fully guide you through overcoming this fear in one post. That’s why I offer one-on-one counselling sessions, details are available on my website, faceyourthoughts.com. But you can start here by understanding why this is happening and what steps you can take to move forward.
Steps to help you on your road to recovery, to overcome the fear of swallowing:
✔️ Explore what trauma you experienced, how to process it, and how to manage stressors in your life.
✔️ Practice relaxation techniques, meditation can be extremely helpful.
✔️ Understand the role OCD may be playing and learn about intrusive thoughts.
✔️ Examine your beliefs and the evidence supporting them.
✔️ Begin exposure with very small steps, gradually building up.
keep an eye out for more posts, as I continue to explore OCD and Phobias in more in depth.
kate.faceyourthoughts@gmail.com
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